Reoccurring Nightmare

It all starts around September,
Like a black cloud crawling and twisting its way into my psyche.
Just about the time where the green grass dies,
When the leaves turn colors on the trees,
Soon to fall to their death.
My heart, attached a mental weight of pain with thick metal hooks that cut deep inside the arteries.
Its almost to difficult to bare.
Though the only hope I have is to watch the days continue to pass by,
The time is slow and catastrophic.
So I hide myself and hibernate like a bear in a cave.
Afraid to go outside, to communicate with the living,
for I am dead.
So I watch the leaves die from my window.
Wondering if I to will ever feel the rays of the sun touch my skin again,
Bringing me slowly back to existence.
The nightmare continues while the snow covers the valley and hills where my neighborhood is.
The freezing winter shivers my cracking bones.
When will I atone for my ignorance?
Appease my wish, Mr. Universe.
Let me come to you with a rich gratitude for the things I have lost and the things I have gained because of my tragedies.
Life is not supposed to be focused on heart ache.
Revive my soul like a phoenix, and let my soul fly.
For my pain was given, so that my wings may grow.

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